As your parent ages, you could be tasked with making decisions for him or her. Understandably, your parent might have mixed feelings about this. His or her feelings could lead to resistance, which can make it challenging to get the help your parent needs. If you are having trouble with convincing your parent to accept the need for certain decisions you have made, here are some tips for working with him or her.
Find Out Why Your Parent Is Resisting
If you have tried to convince your parent to accept a decision and he or she has resisted, it can be frustrating. Instead of letting frustration take over, you need to develop a plan for talking to and working with your parent. A good place to start in making a plan is to find out why your parent is resisting.
For instance, if your parent is refusing to move into a senior living facility, the fear of being abandoned could be the reason for the resistance. If you know this fairly on in the discussions, you can take steps to reassure your parent that he or she will not be forgotten.
Avoid Treating Your Parent Like a Child
One of the biggest fears that people have as they age is a fear of losing their independence. Having to rely on you and other family member more and more can make your parent feel as if he or she no longer has any control over his or her life. If you talk to your parent like he or she is a child when discussing his or her care, you could be feeding into his or her fears.
You have to remember that your parent is not a child. He or she is an adult and should be treated as such. Avoid talking down to your parent and speak to him or her as you normally would.
Pick a Better Time
Despite the urgency of the request that you have of your parent, picking the right time is crucial. If you choose the wrong time, you could be met with more resistance than you are prepared to handle.
There are several key moments that you could use to broach a difficult subject with your parent. For instance, a gathering in which other family members who are involved in the care of your parent are in attendance. A quiet meeting with those members and your parent could be enough to potentially sway them. However, it is important that you avoid appearing as if you are ganging up on your parent.